Dementors In My Closet

Time changes everything, even you and I have changed

BRIE-CHEESE.
Hey, hey. NSG'11. Taurus. Sixteen years young.
Both loves and hates easily. Can be cute and funny, but also annoying and depressing.
Loves yellow, books and words, food, good movies, friends, laughter and buying things :)
C'est moi ^^

The rain, the winter spring has made us fade away

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I really wonder how you feel on these nights so alone

Lia.
Bec.
Carmen. (inactive?)
Elena.
Bella.
Elaine.
Sunny.
Kwan.
Suvarna.
Lauren.

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“you keep me wide awake and waiting for the sun”

'cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things

Wednesday, March 30, 2011 || 12:55 AM

Awesome. Yeah I said I wasn't going to post anymore, but everything looks so empty and I feel so empty...and yet so full of emotion at the same time.

Last night I went to bed extremely annoyed with everything and everyone, and on top of that I had a splitting headache and my eyes were burning even when I closed them to go to sleep. I told myself that I wasn't going to school because (to be honest) I didn't want to speak to anyone. I wanted to give myself a break and spend sometime by myself to clear my thoughts and establish where my feelings are. So when I woke up my headache had transformed into a migraine and I felt incredibly nauseous. (When I look back, I struggle to decide whether it was mostly due to the migraine or...my decision to not see anyone). But when I told Mum that I felt sick and was going to stay home, she told me to go to school because it is important and blah blah blah. So I went. Stupid idiot. And then I threw up at the bus stop. In front of people. It was humiliating and embarrassing and I burst into tears. So I ran back home straight away, not caring the look my mother gave me, and I collapsed onto my bed and sobbed until I fell asleep.
I woke up because my phone was ringing, so I answered it, and I am not going to post about that conversation---
So basically my day was full of crying and thinking about my life. It was great fun. I don't feel like I'm about to throw up anymore, but my headache is still there and all I want to do is sit and cry. And yes I want to talk to someone so bad that I want to stay awake to see whether anyone will speak to me. I've attempted to do some work in order to distract myself from the 'reality of my situation'. But even that has it's limitations.

This week as been awful. Sorry for being so vague about what I'm feeling. I just don't want you to know.